[ Content | Sidebar ]

Posts tagged intimidation

abuse

interpret the word however you like.
if you have absolutely no power in your relationship,
no control over your own life
and no hope
this is abuse.

stalemate

I had a dear friend once. She was originally from England. She had a uniquely marvelous perspective on the American world. She was one of the few truly honest persons I had ever known. I loved her within minutes of meeting her.
I came to learn that her husband was terribly critical [...]

brutal honesty

No, your mean spirited truth can not destroyed me,
nor will I fall apart while you slice the very air with the
sharpened knives of your unkind words.

the view from within

What, exactly, is domestic violence? It is just physical abuse? And what exactly is verbal/mental abuse? What does that mean? Is verbal abuse a reason to leave, even if he has never hit you?

self-love and renewal

How will you ever dig yourself out of this hole if you do not love yourself, and your own life, enough to push the emotional rubbish off of your face and climb out? Self-love, amazingly enough, is simply having a basic sense of self-preservation that is intact and functioning.

moondust

dreams and wishes are made of moondust
and, if you believe,
little fairies will sprinkle moondust on your eyelids at bedtime
you will have beautiful dreams
and
a beautiful day tomorrow
if
you believe in moondust and fairies
nobody changes, really
we wish they would, but they do not,
we might even pray that they will
but they can not
god will not change him for you
only [...]

cornered

The abuser does not have a need to recover when the relationship ends. He simply moves on. He has his pride to protect. He puts on his nice guy face and goes out hunting for a fresh victim. He will tell everyone that he sent the other on her way.
It [...]

sleep walking with the Death Angel

Our baby son died in his crib just before he was five months old.
“You must have walked in your sleep and smothered him.”

He was such a happy baby, he had great big belly laugh and he loved to bounce on a knee, anybody’s knee. His sisters adored him. At two and four, [...]

in the beginning: avoiding the abusive relationship

Every woman should educate herself on domestic violence. Whether you think it will ever personally affect you, you owe yourself a little education on the subject. There are a few good books/movies on the Booklist page. There are many, many blogs on the subject. . .
The bottom line is, always, abuse. Whether verbal, physical, mental: Abuse is the killer of happiness. The breaker of hearts. The shovel that buries the cheerful soul in the dust. Abuse runs rampant until somebody stops it.

old woman

The old woman in the mirror greets me with a sleepy scowl. Wrinkles are breaking out like acne. I used to have a neck. Where did my neck go?
I am sixty-two. How did I ever get this old? Half way to one hundred twenty-four.
I guess a few wrinkles are appropriate.
Some days, [...]

Women Make Movies: Pink Saris

(Photo courtesy of Pink Saris)
PINK SARIS to broadcast on HBO2 | Wednesday, November 30
“…a remarkably honest and urgent film, and Sampat is an unforgettable character.”
Anthropology Review Database
“Highly Recommended.”
Educational Media Reviews Online
“A girl’s life is cruel…A woman’s life is very cruel,” notes Sampat Pal, the complex protagonist at the center of PINK SARIS, internationally acclaimed director [...]

ptsd

Excuse me, but battered women function at a very high level. They manage to dance between death and its expectation every day of their lives. They shop, cook, clean, and clean, and clean, do laundry, take the kids to school and back, and humbly serve their “master” while planning, privately, to open the earth under him, or some other especially violent retribution for their pain and humiliation.

into the night sky

Today is the first day of the rest of my forever. I will cherish this day, and this night, and be thankful for the days I have had, both good and not so good, and whatever tomorrows will become part of my history.
I am beginning to believe that we are all just learning to [...]

food for thought

The drama of control extended to every area of my life, every particle of my being. My critical mind was gone, battered into submission. The violence and hatred had taken its toll over the years.

Steve’s story

Whatever your sexual preference, if the threat of violence is in your life you will understand Steve and feel his pain. What is there to do, really, when you are being threatened? Having “been there, done that” … my response is “run for your life.” T

alone

My best advice? Have the number of a shelter memorized. Do away with anything that he can use to track you down or hurt your family. Take as little as possible. Escape is just that. It is not a vacation.

words

words
are only sounds
and letters
until they come alive
this week
a word I have always known
has become imprinted on my psyche
excruciating
I have had three c-sections
that pain was in the recovery
and in trying to zip up my jeans
over the red hot swollen scar that was my abdomen
I lost my only son to SIDS
that pain is in my soul
I will [...]

Domestic Violence: definition

According to some studies, less that 1 percent of domestic violence cases are reported to the police. According to the Centers for Disease Control, domestic violence is a serious, preventable public health problem affecting more than 25 million American women.