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Posts tagged exhaustion

verbal rape

Some of us are only mildly neurotic about our bodies, and some of us are severely neurotic. This fawker figured out one comeback for every woman alive. I suspect he practices in front of his mirror; as he expects some kind of wrong to happen to him daily. He says: You are a Fat Pig, and now he feels superior. Certainly his command of the English Language is to be applauded.

dark night

I always recommend Women Who Run With the Wolves, by Clarissa Pincola Estes, Ph.D. (the book is available at Amazon). She really digs into those Dark Man dreams and how paying attention to them can help you with important decisions in your life. This book saved my life. Every woman should read it!

be angry, be very angry

I am in favor of the “get out while you can” strategy, rather than that “try again” claptrap that is preached and prodded and counseled by the best of the educated but uninitiated. If you go back, or keep trying to fix the thing, you could end up dead. Or worse. (And yes, I can assure you that there are worse things than being dead.)

stay, or go?

If you are abused, there are two things left to you: Staying -or- Leaving.
I thought I was keeping the family together. That it was better for my children to have their father with them. I thought that god wanted it this way.
My two little girls needed their mother, but she was gone. [...]

the view from within

What, exactly, is domestic violence? It is just physical abuse? And what exactly is verbal/mental abuse? What does that mean? Is verbal abuse a reason to leave, even if he has never hit you?

old woman

The old woman in the mirror greets me with a sleepy scowl. Wrinkles are breaking out like acne. I used to have a neck. Where did my neck go?
I am sixty-two. How did I ever get this old? Half way to one hundred twenty-four.
I guess a few wrinkles are appropriate.
Some days, [...]

ptsd

Excuse me, but battered women function at a very high level. They manage to dance between death and its expectation every day of their lives. They shop, cook, clean, and clean, and clean, do laundry, take the kids to school and back, and humbly serve their “master” while planning, privately, to open the earth under him, or some other especially violent retribution for their pain and humiliation.

my mother’s china

Unpacking my mother’s china sends me back into her life so vividly. I wash and dry each piece by hand and put them away very gently.
My mother was a fifties woman. She did what was expected of her. She raised her children. She loved us in the only way that her duty to us [...]

more on hydration

Now that I really think about it . . . I am pretty sure that I was dehydrated most of my adult life. I do not remember ever drinking water as part of my diet. I had not a drop of water for years and years. I survived on coffee and sugary brown liquids. [...]

living with pain

Pain has been my constant companion
for may days and nights
and long ago
and years to go from now
if that be so