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Posts tagged domestic violence

abuse

interpret the word however you like.
if you have absolutely no power in your relationship,

no control over your own life

and no hope
this is abuse.

rain

burning black sand

extravagantly bright flowers 
quite suddenly dripping
 with warm rain
 that pounds the earth with unreasonable fury
in a moment, the rain is gone 
and the sand is burning hot again
violence is not rain

it does not simply stop.

bravery is necessary

yet one time more 
than you believe is in you
run

before you cannot

i saw the play

It’s been thirty plus years since I left my abuser. Thirty years, and still, the reminder of one moment, all that time ago, can steal my breath.
Not any particular moment. There were a lot of bad moments back then. It can be just a random memory, even a sound, or a smell, but most [...]

brutal honesty

No, your mean spirited truth can not destroyed me,
nor will I fall apart while you slice the very air with the
sharpened knives of your unkind words.

bullet

I parked at a cheap lot several blocks from my office. I would get out of my car and start the walk. Each step was a victory. I figured that if the bullet got me, I would probably never know it, but I was saddened at the thought of my two young daughters having to go on without me.

the view from within

What, exactly, is domestic violence? It is just physical abuse? And what exactly is verbal/mental abuse? What does that mean? Is verbal abuse a reason to leave, even if he has never hit you?

self-love and renewal

How will you ever dig yourself out of this hole if you do not love yourself, and your own life, enough to push the emotional rubbish off of your face and climb out? Self-love, amazingly enough, is simply having a basic sense of self-preservation that is intact and functioning.

moondust

dreams and wishes are made of moondust
and, if you believe,
little fairies will sprinkle moondust on your eyelids at bedtime
you will have beautiful dreams
and
a beautiful day tomorrow
if
you believe in moondust and fairies
nobody changes, really
we wish they would, but they do not,
we might even pray that they will
but they can not
god will not change him for you
only [...]

be angry, be very angry

I am in favor of the “get out while you can” strategy, rather than that “try again” claptrap that is preached and prodded and counseled by the best of the educated but uninitiated. If you go back, or keep trying to fix the thing, you could end up dead. Or worse. (And yes, I can assure you that there are worse things than being dead.)

the journey of recovery

“. . . I would love to hear more about the journey from the shelter to where you are today. Because the shelter is only temporary, women often go back to their abuser for financial security. What advice do you have that a woman could do to gain financial independence if she has children and [...]