Muir woods This was originally a comment, but I talked Julia into posting it.
This is much too relevant to hide in a comment box. Julia Wasson is my sister. She has an online magazine at blueplanetgreenliving and I am extremely proud of her.

Thank you Belinda, for reaching out to everywoman and everygirl, spreading your message of hope.

As someone recently said of your blog. “Belinda’s message is for anyone who is struggling in a difficult situation.” It is, truly. You show us there is hope on the other side of fear and frustration.

I used to work with a verbally abusive boss (more than one actually). I often wondered what I would do if I could find the courage to leave my job. I was afraid of staying, but more afraid of not being able to survive without a paycheck. I walked on eggshells around him, afraid of making him angry. I worked hard to make him happy, but the rules kept changing: I could not please him, no matter how hard I tried.

Finally, I quit. I gave my notice, then started figuring out what in the world I was going to do next.

Know what? I found a way to make it. Another job appeared in my life, just when I needed it. The universe provided for me what I couldn’t provide for myself. I determined then that I would never work for another abuser. (Easier said than done, as it’s often hard to tell in an interview.)

Being in an abusive work relationship is similar to being in an abusive marriage. Self-esteem erodes. The ability to function independently declines. Fear rules your life. Your health deteriorates.

And the same advice applies, I think: If your boss is berating you and making your life hell, get out. Leave as fast as you can and find a healthy place to work.

Maybe some people have the gumption and the inner resources to fight such injustice right in the workplace, but I didn’t. I left before I had the heart attack I felt coming on. And my life has been so much better for it.

Thanks for inspiring women to believe in ourselves and to leave our abusers (whoever they may be) before it’s too late.