bag lady chat

In our second lifetime, post abuse, my girls and I lived in a small, two bedroom, second-floor apartment. During the summer, new tenants moved in across from us. A woman and a little girl.

I don’t remember when I started to notice that something was very wrong over there. It seems like maybe it [...]

You may not want to face that danger.
You may decide to wish it away,
pretend it doesn’t exist,
but what you may not know
is how close you might be to terminal violence.

So, you think that you still love your abuser?
Really?
You think that you can work it out with patience and kindness?
Or maybe you think that you can handle it, until it gets better.

Counseling might help.
Forgiveness might work.

Or not.

If today were the day that he killed you
would you wonder why you stayed?

“I bought some sunflowers, they were so cheerful.”
I can’t buy them. I can’t even cut them.
We have roses. . .
“You hear the flowers screaming . . .”
Yes, I do. (How did you know?)

what draws a woman to a man who berates her?
to a person who takes power over her?
what flame is that with such power over us?

if there is nothing but love
or hate
in this world

which will you choose?

if all of life were this lovely
perhaps
there would be no fear
or anxiety
or troubles between people
if all of life were as innocent
as a flower,
and every sound
as peaceful as petal dust,
if every breeze brought only lovely summer scents
and fireflies,
then, just perhaps,
people
could be kind and lovely
to one another as well

A weakness
is a Power
that you have not yet discovered
within yourself.

I have been walking every evening this past month
it is becoming almost more necessary for my soul
than my body.
so many trees around me,
I reach out to caress low hanging branches
with my fingertips
softly brushing leaves and flowers,
absorbing their energy,
mingling our particles
for eternity
I speak my breath toward them in return,
lest I take without giving.
Craning my neck upward [...]